Where Do I Start? Getting Your Teen Evaluated for Mental Health or Learning Issues
5 November 2025

Where Do I Start? Getting Your Teen Evaluated for Mental Health or Learning Issues

When your teen seems overwhelmed, anxious, or falling behind, it can be difficult to know what to do next. This guide walks parents through the first steps of getting help — from talking to school counsellors and doctors to understanding what assessments involve and how to start the conversation with your teen.

You’ve noticed something is different. Maybe your teen seems sad, anxious, withdrawn, or frustrated. Maybe their grades have dropped, or school has become a daily battle. You’ve tried talking, supporting, and encouraging — but you can’t shake the feeling that something deeper might be going on.

If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone. Getting your teen evaluated for mental health or learning issues can feel intimidating, but it’s also one of the most loving and proactive things you can do. This guide will help you understand where to start, what to expect, and how to talk to your teen about getting help.

1. Who to Talk to First

When you’re worried about your teen, the first step is simply starting the conversation — and finding the right professional to listen.

Here are some good places to begin:

School Counselor or Psychologist

If your concerns are showing up at school — poor grades, behavior changes, focus issues, or social struggles — start here.
School counselors and psychologists can:

  • Observe your teen in class

  • Arrange screenings for learning or attention difficulties

  • Recommend next steps, like a full psychological evaluation or special accommodations

Tip: Keep communication open with teachers, too. They often notice patterns you might not see at home.

Family Doctor or GP

If the issues seem more emotional or physical (sleep problems, fatigue, anxiety, mood swings), your GP is a great first step.
They can:

  • Rule out medical causes (like thyroid, anemia, or medication effects)

  • Refer you to a mental health professional (psychologist, psychiatrist, or therapist)

  • Provide documentation if a school-based assessment is needed

Psychologist or Psychiatrist

  • Psychologists focus on assessment, testing, and therapy. They can diagnose learning disorders, ADHD, autism, anxiety, depression, and more.

  • Psychiatrists are medical doctors who can diagnose and prescribe medication when needed — often working in partnership with a psychologist or therapist.

Therapist or Counselor

If you’re not sure where to start, and your teen is open to talking, a licensed therapist can be a good first connection. They can help your teen explore what’s happening emotionally, and refer for testing if needed.

2. What Assessments Look Like

Every evaluation looks a little different depending on the concern, but here’s what you can expect in general.

Step 1: Initial Conversations

  • You’ll share what you’ve noticed — mood changes, academic challenges, social withdrawal, or anything else.

  • The professional will gather background info about your teen’s development, school history, and family health.

Step 2: Testing and Observation

Depending on the concern, your teen might complete:

  • Questionnaires (for anxiety, depression, ADHD symptoms, etc.)

  • Cognitive or learning tests (reading, memory, attention, reasoning)

  • Behavioral observations at home or school

  • Interviews with parents and teachers for a full picture

Step 3: Feedback and Recommendations

Once testing is complete, you’ll receive a report explaining:

  • What the results mean

  • Whether your teen meets criteria for a diagnosis

  • Recommendations for school supports, therapy, or medical follow-up

Important: A diagnosis isn’t a label — it’s a roadmap. It helps you understand how your teen’s brain works, and what supports can help them thrive.

3. How to Talk to Your Teen About Getting Help

This can be the hardest part for many parents. Teens often feel embarrassed, defensive, or scared about the idea of “needing help.” Here are some ways to keep the conversation open and respectful.

  • Start with empathy, not fear.
    “I’ve noticed you’ve been feeling really down lately, and I’m worried about you. You don’t have to go through this alone.”

  • Normalize the process.
    “Just like we’d see a doctor if your knee hurt, this is about getting support for your mind and emotions.”

  • Involve them in the decision.
    Teens are more likely to cooperate when they feel they have a say. Ask: “Would you rather talk to someone at school or someone outside?”

  • Keep it pressure-free.
    The goal isn’t to “fix” them — it’s to understand what’s going on and make life a little easier.

Tip: Sometimes starting with a neutral professional (like a school counselor or pediatrician) feels less intimidating than jumping straight to “mental health evaluation.”

4. Debunking Stigma and Fear

Many parents (and teens) worry that getting a diagnosis means something is “wrong.” In reality, it’s about understanding differences — not assigning blame.

  • A diagnosis doesn’t define your teen. It explains patterns and challenges so they can get the right help.

  • Early support changes everything. The sooner you understand what’s going on, the easier it is to find tools that work.

  • You’re not alone. Millions of families go through this process every year — and it often brings relief, clarity, and hope.

     

    5. Takeaway: You Don’t Have to Have All the Answers

    Parenting a teen with possible mental health or learning challenges can feel like walking through fog. But taking the first step — making that call, scheduling that appointment — is the beginning of clearing it.

    Your job isn’t to solve everything. It’s simply to notice, to care, and to help your teen find the support they need to grow into the person they’re meant to be.

    What’s Next

    This post gave you the big picture of where to start and who to talk to when you’re worried about your teen’s mental health or learning journey.

    In the next two follow-up posts, we’ll dig a little deeper into the practical “how-to” for South African families:

    • Part 3a: Navigating the Private Route – a step-by-step guide to finding and working with private psychologists, psychiatrists, and therapists. 

    • Part 3b: Getting Help Through the State System – how to use school-based support teams, WCED district services, and public-health clinics to access affordable assessments and care.

    These companion posts will give you clear checklists, sample scripts, and local resources so you can choose the path that fits your family best.

    👉 Stay tuned for Part 3a and 3b — coming soon!